A Late Night Ghost Story...

[Lychwood]

You've somehow found yourself in a pub. It's dim, loud, and the patrons all seem to be a mix of clannish regulars--you get a few curious looks on your way to the bartop. There, gracefully serving up drinks between the pluming trails of Trendigo's cigarettes (yes, plural) is what can only be described as a beautiful man. He winks as you settle onto a stool.



"First time? I can tell, because I haven't seen you before. If you've been here, I've seen you. I haven't seen you. Which means you're new. So what's your poison? And more importantly--what's your deal?"

The man finishes pouring an intricately layered, multi-color drink as he listens. Then he downs it in one indelicate swallow.

"The WHAT? Oh, come on--Kharn can do it, right? Doesn't he usually handle the press releases? Oh, he wasn't there? Well, what about Puppy--or one of the McCreas? Not available? Uhh...Uhhh...

...Cerce? Surely they can do the battle report..."

LYCHWOOD DOES THE BATTLE REPORT

"Ugh...ok. Ok. Settle in. Just...here. Take the whole bottle and serve yourself. I've got to think about where to start...oh, and just so we've got everything out in the open: this is a spooky one. So if you piss your pants, it's on you bub. I'll give you the rag but you've gotta scrub it out.

...so where were we...

Ah yes. This story begins the way all good ghost stories begin--with parliamentary procedure. You see, the Powers Below...er, the Dark Alliance...er..." sigh "...The Downstairs Agreement...had gathered it's netherly eminencies to hash out a plan of battle."



"They had, of course, an infernally intricate discussion weighing out the infinite concerns of war, as anyone would expect from a summit of such masterful tacticians. And, the massive weight of their combined intelligence brought to bear upon the problem before them, they eventually concluded that only one path forward existed:

'mangle. angle.'

And so it came to pass that the drums of war beat once more in the deeps of Centrum, that the villanous scum of the Nexus excised itself from the nooks and crannies of the world and coalesced into a big... uh... pile... uh... what's the opposite of 'shining ranks'? Just picture that.

So there we were. Marching into battle. Armed with the knowledge that this was meticulously planned and NOT a spur of the moment decision.

- The most adorable puppy was flying and has now landed. (2022-01-30 19:59:37).
- The most adorable puppy said, "BARK BARK" (2022-01-30 19:59:41).
- an inappropriate preposition suddenly appeared in a flash of hellish, brimstone-laced smoke, heeding the infernal call of Annie Baker. (2022-01-30 20:01:26).
- Clodia suddenly appeared in a flash of hellish, brimstone-laced smoke, heeding the infernal call of Annie Baker. (2022-01-30 20:01:32).
- Tomoe Gozen suddenly appeared in a flash of hellish, brimstone-laced smoke, heeding the infernal call of Annie Baker. (2022-01-30 20:01:35).
- Gurren watches the demon pope at work (2022-01-30 20:01:57).
- You feel as though an oppressive weight opposes your actions. You have spent an additional action point to attempt this action. (2022-01-30 20:01:57).
- The most adorable puppy destroyed a Glyph of Slowing vs Evil protecting this location! (2022-01-30 20:02:35).
- Portia Dean suddenly appeared in a flash of hellish, brimstone-laced smoke, heeding the infernal call of Annie Baker. (2022-01-30 20:02:51).
- Annie Baker said, "Heed my call, sweeties!" (2022-01-30 20:04:07).
- a dragon dildo was flying and has now landed. (2022-01-30 20:04:23).

All of Praxis trembled.

The walls of the great keep of angeldom stood before us. An iron buttress reaching up to rake the very sky itself. And so the assembled hordes...did their thing. Wailing, gnashing, tearing, spitting, clawing, the whole demon shtick. I had barely finished my flask by the time the walls came crumbling down. The demons HOWLED with glee. SURGED forward to victory!

Ah, but this is where the story gets scary.

The demons found themselves held back, by GHOSTS! The walls of the keep were so strong, so dedicated, that they returned from the grave to turn back the demons!

CHAOS! PANDEMONIUM! WEEPING, TEARING OF HAIR!

- The most adorable puppy said, "BASH ALL THE CADES, WE'LL FIGURE THIS BUG OUT" (2022-01-30 20:04:23).
- Carrot said, "my land legs aren't what they used to be" (2022-01-30 20:07:10).
- Someone used a bullhorn to say: "THIS USUALLY WORKS BETTER, BUT YOUR BARRICADES LEFT SOME STUBBORN GHOSTS BEHIND". It was so loud, it must have come from outside. (2022-01-30 20:07:36).

The demons realized that their aims would be frustrated, the war muster was all for nought. In desperation, they began to carve a path around toward the side of the fortification. Claws tearing desperately. It took an exhausting amount of effort, but eventually they made it through. Only to find that they had been caught, claws in the cookie jar!!

- Someone used a bullhorn to say: "TO THE BARRICADES! REPEL THE FASCIST DOGS!". The sound seems to be coming from inside the building.. (2022-01-30 20:04:46).

Now, I'll take this moment to point out that in reality there were no fascists present on either side, but some people just get very excited and we can't hold that against them. Where were we?

Ah yes. Straits were dire. Direst. The demons knew they had already failed, surely as they knew blood tastes good. And yet, they decided that there was nothing left but to go for it anyway. What had we walked all this way for if not to stab people? The demons rushed in the gap. The demons died. And yet...death proved not to be such an obstacle after all.

- Your pet Joe Hockey, a Soul Thrall, attacked Aethersprite and hit for 10 points of unholy damage. You gain 5 experience points! (2022-01-30 20:09:13).
- Janissary was killed by a defensive aura projected by a dragon dildo! (2022-01-30 20:09:22).
- Your pet Joe Hockey, a Soul Thrall, attacked Aethersprite and missed. (2022-01-30 20:09:24).
- Joe Hockey, a Soul Thrall, belonging to Annie Baker, attacked Aethersprite, killing them! (2022-01-30 20:09:33).

And in some cases...well, honestly I can't think of anything snappy to say--people were getting merked and locusts were fighting wasps!!

- As Yagisan attacked, 1 swarm of Stygian Murder Wasps escaped from the body of Hannah Silberstein and buzzed angrily around them! (2022-01-30 20:09:36).
- Portia Dean said, "You were always dead...now you just finally figured it out..." (2022-01-30 20:09:37).
- As Swarm of Locusts, belonging to Hannah Silberstein, attacked, 1 swarm of Stygian Murder Wasps escaped from the body of Arikita and buzzed angrily around them! (2022-01-30 20:10:14).
- Fenris attacked Ishild with a Bite , killing her! (2022-01-30 20:10:16).
- Annie Baker said, "Roll out, Annie Baker's Dozen! Slaughter for the glory of Hataka-san!" (2022-01-30 20:11:04).

And when mistress called, not even the dead could refuse:

- In a flash of flame and brimstone, an inappropriate preposition popped into existence here, restored to life by their pacts with the Dark Powers. She has returned from the dead! (2022-01-30 20:11:27).

And then...well, it was a slaughter. Angels and demons killing eachother. Transcended on both sides. Explosion after explosion, because Pariahs.

- TheGoof said, "Aha, cowards!" (2022-01-30 20:12:36).
- Your pact with Portia Dean has earned you 5 XP. (2022-01-30 20:12:36).
- Gurren attacked Richard Bonce with a Sword , killing her! (2022-01-30 20:12:38).
- You sense Clodia has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 4 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:12:41).
- Clodia attacked All Might with an Acid Spittle , killing him! (2022-01-30 20:12:41).
- Your pet Joe Hockey, a Soul Thrall, attacked Kent Maddog and hit for 10 points of unholy damage. You gain 10 experience points! (2022-01-30 20:12:42).
- Stygian Murder Wasps, belonging to Hannah Silberstein, was killed by a defensive aura projected by TheGoof! (2022-01-30 20:12:42).
- Pharaoh attacked Hannah Silberstein with an Oaken Greatbow , killing her! (2022-01-30 20:12:47).
- Monognathus blurbles incoherently. (2022-01-30 20:12:47).
- Fenris attacked Justin Abdelkader with a Fangs , killing him! (2022-01-30 20:12:48).
- Your pet Joe Hockey, a Soul Thrall, attacked Kent Maddog and missed. (2022-01-30 20:12:51).
- Your pact with Portia Dean has earned you 2 XP. (2022-01-30 20:12:53).
- Annie Baker said, "Cowards? Who you calling cowards, sweeties? We're BRAWLERS!" (2022-01-30 20:12:58).
- Portia Dean has exploded in a violent flash of hatred and hellfire, spraying heat and gore everywhere. Your pet, Joe Hockey was caught in the attack but managed to avoid injury. (2022-01-30 20:12:59).
- Pharaoh attacked Portia Dean with an Oaken Greatbow , killing her! (2022-01-30 20:12:59).
- Portia Dean has died while bound by the terms of your demonic Pact! You have claimed their soul to serve you in death! (2022-01-30 20:12:59).
- Dark energies pulse in the air around you for a moment and then coalesce in your hand. You gain two Blood Ices. (2022-01-30 20:13:02).
- Joe Hockey, a Soul Thrall, belonging to Annie Baker, attacked Kent Maddog, killing them! (2022-01-30 20:13:02).
- Your pet Joe Hockey, a Soul Thrall, attacked Kent Maddog and hit for 10 points of unholy damage. You gain 10 experience points! This was enough to kill them! You gain an additional 22 experience points! (2022-01-30 20:13:02).
- Arikita attacked TheGoof with a storm of razor sharp icicles, rending flesh from bone and killing them! (2022-01-30 20:13:07).
- Annie Baker said, "You can't handle a knock-down drag-out Winchester fight can ye?" (2022-01-30 20:13:11).
- Fenris attacked William with a Bite , killing him! (2022-01-30 20:13:13).
- Criello suddenly appeared out of thin air. (2022-01-30 20:13:17).
- Gurren has exploded in a violent flash of hatred and hellfire, spraying heat and gore everywhere. Your pet, Portia Dean, takes 15 points of unholy damage. (2022-01-30 20:13:21).
- Gurren has exploded in a violent flash of hatred and hellfire, spraying heat and gore everywhere. Your pet, Joe Hockey was caught in the attack but managed to avoid injury. (2022-01-30 20:13:21).
- Gurren suddenly collapsed, dead, her body surrounded in a cloud of swirling motes of light! (2022-01-30 20:13:21).
- Your pet Joe Hockey, a Soul Thrall, attacked Focooofer and hit for 10 points of unholy damage. You gain 10 experience points! (2022-01-30 20:13:23).
- Your pet Portia Dean, a Soul Thrall, attacked The First Guardian and hit for 8 points of unholy damage. You gain 4 experience points! His armor soaked 2 points of damage. (2022-01-30 20:13:24).
- Criello attacked Pharaoh with a Sub-Machine Gun , killing him! (2022-01-30 20:13:27).

And then...against all odds, a handful of demons and their allies stood alone in pools of mingled blood. Alive, and in disbelief. For the record, I had died eons ago by this point. I was dissociating peacefully in the void and meditating on our colossal failure of an offensive. But, with or without me, the demons celebrated in the only way they know how....

Cannibalism. In the hallowed halls of their hated foes, the few surviving demons turned upon each other and began to feast.

- Monognathus said, "All these corpsssses! Someone shhhhould desecrate them!" (2022-01-30 20:16:36).
- Fenris attacked Marlowe Henderson with a Fangs , killing him! (2022-01-30 20:16:40).

- Annie Baker said, "Eat me next, sweeties!" (2022-01-30 20:16:55).
- Portia Dean, a Soul Thrall, belonging to Annie Baker, attacked Renueve, killing them! (2022-01-30 20:17:03).

- Fenris looks around, soaked in blood, eyes wild (2022-01-30 20:17:14).
- Monognathus coughs, wheezes and sputters. It unwraps to reveal an enticing contract which it leaves on the ground! (2022-01-30 20:17:15).

- Arikita said, "Execute me please." (2022-01-30 20:17:38).
- Clodia said, "please leave if you don't want eaten" (2022-01-30 20:18:15).
- You sense Clodia has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 2 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:18:23).
- Tentāculum Quārtum, a Horrid Tentacle, belonging to Clodia, attacked Criello, killing them! (2022-01-30 20:18:23).
- Arikita said, "Clodia hurry up and eat me" (2022-01-30 20:18:28).
- As Tentāculum Prīmum, a Horrid Tentacle, belonging to Clodia, attacked, 1 swarm of Stygian Murder Wasps escaped from the body of Arikita and buzzed angrily around them! (2022-01-30 20:18:33).
- Arikita said, "Aw yeah here come the wasps" (2022-01-30 20:18:41).

- Tentāculum Tertium, a Horrid Tentacle, belonging to Clodia, attacked Monognathus, killing them! (2022-01-30 20:18:53).

- Arikita said, "Has anyone here ever heard of... the tentacles and the wasps?" (2022-01-30 20:19:29).
- As Annie Baker attacked, 1 swarm of Stygian Murder Wasps escaped from the body of Arikita and buzzed angrily around them! (2022-01-30 20:19:34).
- You attack Arikita with your aura of frigid cold as you reach out to grasp them and hit for 7 points of cold damage. Her armor soaked 3 points of damage. You gain 7 XP. (2022-01-30 20:19:34).
- Arikita said, "It's not a story your parents would tell you" (2022-01-30 20:19:36).
- Clodia attacked Arikita with an Acid Spittle , killing her! (2022-01-30 20:19:48).
- Tentāculum Tertium, a Horrid Tentacle, belonging to Clodia, was killed by a defensive aura projected by Tomoe Gozen! (2022-01-30 20:19:53).
- Tomoe Gozen said, "No I have not" (2022-01-30 20:20:04).

And so it ended...and yet, does anything in the Nexus really end? The dead have already come back to life, the walls are already being rebuilt, and the killers on both sides are already eyeing each other up for the next go. So it's not so much an end as a

...TO BE CONTINUED

[Repth]

- Hannah Silberstein has corrupted your pet, A Swarm of Sand Fleas, a(n) Swarm of Locusts, and installed themselves as the new master of your pet! (2022-01-30 20:06:01).
- Hannah Silberstein suddenly appeared out of thin air. (2022-01-30 20:06:01).

Yoink.

[Klapaucius]

And when mistress called, not even the dead could refuse:

- In a flash of flame and brimstone, an inappropriate preposition popped into existence here, restored to life by their pacts with the Dark Powers. She has returned from the dead! (2022-01-30 20:11:27).

An inappropriate preposition returned during the dead, to provide its previous contribution twice until. Unfortunately, said contribution wasn't a lot but it enjoyed the experience!

(Was preposition the first to be resurrected by priesthood? A dubious honor - thanks Annie. Great work all - a hectic bloodbath, just the kind I like)

- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 2 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:12:15).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 3 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:12:48).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 4 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:13:13).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 2 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:13:58).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 4 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:14:31).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 2 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:14:40).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 4 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:14:46).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 4 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:15:06).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 4 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:15:23).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 4 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:15:56).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 4 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:16:18).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 4 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:16:32).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 3 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:16:40).
- You sense Fenris has made a kill in your name! You accumulate 2 points of Dark Power. (2022-01-30 20:16:46).

Release the hound!

[Fellis]

- You step inside Angle HQ. (2022-01-30 20:04:38).
- You attack the glyph with your triggered Greater Glyph Erasure spell. The glyph flashes and wavers for a moment under the force of the blow. (2022-01-30 20:04:44).
- Magical Girl Heartful Punch attacked you with a Fist and hit for 6 points of piercing damage. (2022-01-30 20:04:48).
- You attack the glyph with your triggered Greater Glyph Erasure spell. There is a burst of heat and light from the glyph as it dissipates. (2022-01-30 20:04:49).
- Magical Girl Heartful Punch attacked you with a Fist and hit for 8 points of piercing damage. (2022-01-30 20:04:51).
- Magical Girl Heartful Punch attacked you with a Fist and hit for 6 points of piercing damage. (2022-01-30 20:04:53).
- Magical Girl Heartful Punch attacked you with a Fist and hit for 8 points of piercing damage. (2022-01-30 20:04:55).
- You attack the glyph with your Greater Glyph Erasure. There is a burst of heat and light from the glyph as it dissipates. (2022-01-30 20:04:55).
- Magical Girl Heartful Punch attacked you with a Fist and hit for 6 points of piercing damage. (2022-01-30 20:04:56).
- Magical Girl Heartful Punch attacked you with a Fist and hit for 8 points of piercing damage. This was enough to kill you! (2022-01-30 20:04:58).

The most adorable puppy appreciates the valiant efforts by some magical girl to stop the teardown of of magical barriers, but clearly puppies > magical girls on adorableness.

[Khaze]

Fenris was pacing back on forth inside the mausoleum. The sun could not have set too quickly and he cursed the thing to oblivion. One day, he thought...

Fenris could smell it in the air. Tonight is the night, the hour of blood, the hour of the wolf. As the last rays of the hated sun sunk beneath the horizon, his ears perked, listening to the nightwind's call.

- Your liege, an inappropriate preposition has issued an urgent summons to their presence! For the next minute you may spend 6 AP, 6 MP, and 6 HP to rally to their location (as long as they remain alive).

Had you been there, you could have sworn a smile crept over his face.

- You heed your liege's call. With a soft whoosh and a jolt of pain, you disappear in a flash of hellish, brimstone-laced smoke and re-appear at your liege's side.

But first, we drink. No feast is complete without a toast. This one in honor of the dark ones for bringing all the little lambs to this gathering. Although he would much rather eat the dark ones too, eating their gifts would have to suffice, for the moment.

- You call upon your wolven animus and soon your muscles bulge, your body hunches over a bit, you feel the heat of fur on your body, and you transform into a half-human, half-wolf figure!
- You feel a great upsurge of power and tension wash over you, protecting you from harm. Your soak will be increased by +4 against all attacks while under the effects of the Greater Invulnerability potion.
- You feel your muscles thrum with power. While under the influence of the Strength potion, you will deal an additional +2 damage with hand-to-hand and melee attacks and can carry more items.
- You feel a rush of power as the Boon of Tholaghru descends upon you. With each action you take, you will gain 2 hit points (4 if the action is an attack) while the Boon lasts. This gain can take you over your normal maximum, though any excess will be lost when the Boon is withdrawn.
- You activate the Boon of Tlacolotl, cloaking yourself in a cloak of malice and brimstone that will deal unholy damage. While the boon is active, supplemental damage dealt by your attacks will be unsoakable.
- You step inside Banquet Hall™.

... and let the feast begin.

Fenris had never been known to say no to food when offered, but even he had to admit some were a bit chewy:

- You attack TheGoof with your Fangs and hit for 3 points of piercing damage. You started a combination attack! His armor soaked 16 points of damage. They were protected by an intense, holy aura! You take 8 points of holy damage! Unholy waves of energy around you snake forth at them, assaulting them for 0 points of unholy damage! You gain 3 XP.
- TheGoof said, "C'mon, surely you can do better than that?" (THE NERVE!)
- You attack TheGoof with your Fangs and hit for 6 points of piercing damage. This was a critical hit! You dealt 3 more damage from a combination attack! His armor soaked 16 points of damage. They were protected by an intense, holy aura! You take 8 points of holy damage! Unholy waves of energy around you snake forth at them, assaulting them for 0 points of unholy damage! You gain 6 XP.
- TheGoof said, "It's not enough, Fenris! Hahah" (GRRRRR)

In addition to being chewy, some of it was awfully spicy:

- You attack Jardal with your Bite and hit for 32 points of arcane damage. This was a critical hit! You dealt 3 more damage from a combination attack! This attack was charged with arcane power! They were protected by an intense, holy aura! You take 14 points of holy damage! You gain 32 XP. This was enough to kill them! You gain an additional 23 Experience Points!

Thankfully it wasn't all just eating, as the event proved to be educational, too!

- Consuming the blood of the Wizard fills your undead body with a vestige of his magical power and knowledge!

Haha, did you think the dread wolf wasn't frightening enough? Now he knows kungf-- spells!